love is right or wrong???

Guys what is love???? love is right or wrong??? can anyone answer me??? well i can said i lie to friends coz of love for someone but is that wrong... i dunno what is right or wrong in love.... i can said sorry for those who involve and i lie but what i lie is it because i wan to fool u guys or is it that time i really need you guys??? that time did i really need u guys or i only act to get attention from u guys??? besides my love life did i ever lie to u guys b4.... i asking frankly??? did i ever lie besides my love live??? if do tell me and prove to me.... you guys said in front of me this that and bla bla bla... and i never said aword y?? coz if you don't have a nice word to said just shut up as words can cut the heart and make the deepesst scar.... i'm not because i'm scare or what is because i respected you guys and don't wan the problem to become bigger.... if that night when u guys come down and i explain and answer everything u ask urself frankly will u trust or ask yourself will u ever will accept the answer or you will get more angry and shoot me with dozen and million of reason.... Love is weird and it can blind u for a moment and it can even blind u for live but love someone is it wrong??? or love someone too much is it wrong???? if u love someone and the one commited a crime and regreted could you forgive him/her??? for me yes i will forgive her as long as she regreted and nv ever lie to me again... yes i dunno whether i will be hurt by her a not but... i trusting her for now.... she did change and i can felt it.... she did not get angry often... and now even become more and more polite..... i love her and thats it... and i can never ever lie to myself i love her.... there are two circles of friends which one ask me to forget bout her and one circle of friends ask me to love back her... those who ask me forget her i know that you guys scare i will get hurt by her again and i understand thank you you guys for caring and concerning,..... while a group of friends ask me to accept her y??? coz they know me too love her... and too soft heart.... and they really understand me... y coz they know me longer and know me in every relationship is serious... they know me and understand about me but they did remind me to get her change before truely accept her... that day i really felt she regret and i really felt her heart open and she really cry out.... i melt my cold heart when she cry on my shoulder and maybe is really our faith to be back together.... guys give her one more chance or guys give me one more chance.... if she can't change then let her sometimes to change.. and guys from now on whther bout my love relation or what you guys ask i tell.... and if you guys felt that is not worth for me to ask for one more chances from you guys then fine... just delete my msn or whatever and thats all.... for those who give me support all those day.. thankyou and as i promise if i really win the kickstart if i really win... whether we are friends or not the money i will still pass it to u guys.....  friends or foe, pals or enemies, chances or punishment is all decided by u guys.... and i can said i nv ever fool u guys and i did use my heart to friend u guys.... and i did......

i have doubt and problem....

well i dunno what happen and i dunno what have been discuss among those girls.. and i was so so so so so so so..... curious.... well man out there beware of the girls and beware of them especially especially when girls talking or having a meeting among them self...... Now i have a feeling of hz..... and girls girls girls make me felt scary of them.... i just wan to ask and what i get is forget bout it.. start everything a new day... no more past... and another reply don't ask girls about girls talk.... if you have a doubt and about you will you ask???? and now it seems that i'm the one who were wrong and i mean the one who should be blame..... well i swear to god if i nv treat a friend with a heart i should die from the day it started.... One thing i hate the most is talk and talk and talk behind my back and is talk..... i can;t bare it the thing i sense that when she msg me i can sense the blaming wau so strong.... and when ask.... only answer i should not tell you anything... just promise people what you promise.... hey is i really make the promise that day in the bus??? Is it really i who said out the condition...... is it i who said that the RM200 for them?? IS NOT ME who make the condition... yes i did do the sign but is it from my heart... ya i admit that rm10000 if i win rm2000 is for them to vacation and i did not denied it and rm1000 for the sponsoring of projector and i did not denied also... but rm200 is not me who make the condition ok??? I dunno y u guys did not see... and i dunno y......????? and if u guys think i'm not even worth mentioning or even what just tell me and from now on i know what to do..... and i mean it.... in my entire life i never ever treat friends as fools and i never ever treat friends badly... Did i do anything to you guys that will make you guys bankrupt or lost anything??? If do sorry and tell me what have you guys lost... money??? if so tell me.... I dunno what is the effect for me now... but i can said ur heart is feeling not good and why why why.... when angry appear in your mind and when it really really appear bias will appear and all the thinks spoken up will be double and i mean salt la.... personal opinion and when those who spoke it out and told others... the influence will be more and more and what dicussion make is it from the own pure heart..... or is it really from bias..... if wan discuss with all those involve... and discuss it.... dun discuss it without those involve not there as it isn't fair for anyone who can't defend itself.. and it isn't fair when u dunno what have been judge on you and it isn't fair........ who should i get this answer from now...... For those who are my friends and pals out there... ask yourself frankly when did i used you guys and when did i do something to harm you guys.... ask yourself whenever you guys need help did i stretch out my hand??? did i ever shouted at you guys and when you guys down did i ever stamp my feet on you??? Ask yourself frankly...... and i swear that i nv used you guys for anything and if i do, do tell me about it........

What is love?

Guys do you know what is love??? Or do you guys ever experience love???? Love can hurt you the most and make the deepest cut in your heart and leave a scar on it but love can also heal your heart. Is it true??? Can anyone really prove it??? 

Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends.

Well what is love?

LOVE is when you can SAY to someone, "I LOVE YOU!"

LOVE is when you get to HOLD someone's hands.

LOVE is when you can TALK on the phone for hours.

LOVE is when you give a HUG to someone.

LOVE is when you got to ACCOMPANY her for shopping for hours
LOVE is when you GIVE someone a massage.
LOVE is when you SHOW someone you care!
LOVE is a GOOD feeling.
LOVE is EMOTIONAL and SWEEPS me off my feet!
LOVE is a GOOD feeling.

LOVE is UNEXPLAINABLY MAGICAL!

LOVE is LAUGHING and CRYING together.
LOVE is buying presents.
LOVE is CARRYING each other's burden.
LOVE is LENDING someone your shoulder!
LOVE is GENEROUS!
LOVE is APPRECIATIVE!

LOVE is TRANS-ETHICNITY!

LOVE is TRANS-GEOGRAFICAL!
LOVE is TRANS-GENERATION!

LOVE is COLOR-BLIND!

LOVE is FOOD to the soul!

LOVE is to care and to concern, to show respect to each other and to enjoy cheerfulness and hapiness together with the one you love..... 

LOVE have so many kinds of love whether couple love, parents love, friendship love, pet's love and etc....

HOW DO LOVE APPEARED AND HOW DO IT WORK???

LOVE does'nt come by force nor by luck... LOVE come naturally, LOVE come with time just like when a baby was born he felt everyone is a stranger to him, he is alieanated but what make him bond with her parents??? Is time that we dedicated to the baby, the time we sacrify, the way we raise him up, the time you being together with him, the time when the baby wake you at night you did't angry but with a smile and care and said "DON"T CRY MUMMY AND DADDY IS HERE"! the effort we put in it and thats when the love start to grow.. when the baby recognised love and when the baby felt protected in ones hug is all because of the feeling of love..... LOVE need time to grow with and need time to make sure we are familiar with the one we love around us.... LOVE grows when we share the same passion, share the same food, do the things together, share the burden and every relationship that end with faliure is because of one main thing that is communication.

The word "communicate" in Greek is the word "koinonia" which means fellowship.

communication with your partner or the one you love is important as understanding means that you guys will have no problem to live together but if your communication have a problem and thats all the problem started misunderstanding...

DO YOU KNOW GUYS THERE ARE 5 POWER OF WORDS

i.  WORDS go DEEP into a person's SOUL.

ii. WORDS can BREAK a person.

iii. WORDS GUIDE our LIVES.

iv. WORDS have great DESTRUCTIVE power.

v.  WORDS DETERMINE the RELATIONSHIP.

Well some idioms said that a word is mightier than a sword

"There is one who speaks like piercings of a sword, but the tongue of the wise promotes health"

well boys and girls to have a good relationship and maintaining it you need to understand them and here the question HOW MAN AND WOMAN ARE WIRED?

Well man are like RUBBER BANDS...why???

because man will need sometimes to be alone and not to be stick together all the time as they have their private times too.... but one thing best about man is that they will start from where they stop.. for example when they stop at stage 3 they will continue back stage 4 and so woman out there do not over occupied your man times as if a rubber band get to tense you will know what will happen thats is break. BUT when you sometimes open your hand it will be back the old shape and the man will love you more than ever before....

Woman are like waves???

because they will have high wave when everything becomes joy and happy and the peak of the moment but every peak they will be the down fall of a woman and the boys will felt weird and dunno what happen their girl friend just shout and said wana break up and what the boys will do is just said "WHAT DID I DO WRONG WOH?!?" and thats all breakup starts... boys perfect tips is that every girls emotion is just like the econpmy of the world... the chart will be up and down then to the peak and drop to the lowest point but what can you guys do to prevent it... answer is do nothing.. as nothing can prevent them.... on the lowest point girls will think back their deepest sorrow and everything start to appear back bad memories..... and boys remember one think resist the temptation to provide solution althought how smart are you... just listen to them.. yes listen is all the girls need and after a while their stock just like been inject with extra money and raise to the peak again... remember guys... you can't prevent the waves in the girls life but you can always surf with the waves.......

Hope all the guys and girls out there understand your partner and everything will have  agood ending and remember when you guys end up in a marriage is not happily ever after but a new begining in life with the new one you love and remember that there will be no more single live but you will need to do everything with the person and in years time another person in your life too...

REMEMBER LOVE is to concern, share and to communicate, guard your love one, and love need time to grow.. if you in a relationship tolerate your partner and don't ever change them but let your love make them change.. love a person is with who they are and not love the person that who you want.....

1001 gurauan belum tentu mengukir satu semyuman

tetapi hanya satu sindiran sudah cukup melukakan hati seseorang

dan hanya dengan kasih sayang sudah cukup untuk membuktikan 

saya sayang kepada mu... I LOVE YOU.....

to all couples out there happy valentine

Alamanda (9 Feb)

well.. really still felt a bit down and still can't get over it so asked my roomate to go for a movie and he said sure... so we take a bus t429 and when to putrajaya sentral and change to putra nadi to alamanda. Along the way i bring the DV Cam to experiment how to use it and capture everything i need.... b4 going to alamanda i really thought of watching a movie but suddenly when i reach the cinema it reminds me of someone and felt no mood anymore.... so i tell my roomate that we have a walk and see i can get any idea from it..... then he said ok... and we walk and i decided maybe to buy a coffee maker machine and indeed i bought one... haha.... i call my mom and ask her that i'm going to buy the machine and she ask me to think by myself as i'm already grow up.... so i have a thought and decided to buy it which cost me RM300.... SO i straight go to the atm and withdraw the money. Then i when to parkson, cool storage Giant, and carefore to search for espresso bean and milk to make cuppocino... i buy all the things and is already late and we rushed back home..... i'm quite happy with the machine right now and i'm going to experiment more on how to make a good coffee and the main idea is i wan to take a video to make sure i can compete rm10000 in the nescafe kickstart......

o ya forget to list out 8 feb.....

haiz so "sui" seee what she hate done to my face......

i only do this nia mah....... haha....

OPEN HOUSE......8 FEB

Today wake up quite early becoz having a function in Titiwangsa..... The fuction is an open house and we are invited to join it...... When we arrive there are already hundreds of people over there and you can see most of them are wearing red shirt because is an Chinese New Year open house.... When me and my friends arrive the function already start, and we when to the grandhall and there it is lion dance... Lion dance is already similiar to all the chinese folks and a must have activity during chinese new years because of the symbolic of luck.... The chinese believe that Lion dance can bring luck and those unhapppy things and bad things can be cast away.... The lion will do many tricks and those of it symbolic many meaning. Eg throwing raw vegetables around the place means in chinese is "sang choi sang choi" grow wealth, opening an mandarin orange symbolic gold, pineapple symbolic weath arrive "ong lai" and many more.... after the lion dance, there a several more performances mainly singing, dancing, acting and of coz a not miss in an open house is food..... well  there are lots of food out there and there are many peoples too.... you need to wait for your ques in order to get the foods and man so hot and crowded.... well on the way we saw kei them so we walk over there said hi and started chat and soon alice, nicholas wan all come over and join us.... and normal action they will do now is always sing "feng shou kuai le" zzzz..... infront of me..... You know when ever free they sing the song in front of me again....hz...... and after the function Nicholas asked us whether wan to go to Mr Wu house for open house and since nothing to do we said ok...... so we move to Mr Wu house which is consequencely near my brother house... We when to Mr Wu house and what amazing is that his house have a karoke set and what you know kei them wanted to do.... open the Fish Leong Song again and sing....zzzz the same song "feng shou kuai le" hz.... they don't bored i also bored ah..... and they sing all those sad song about breaking up....zzzz me hear also sad sad lo...... then at there we play cards too and later since my house so near they all decided to come to my bro house to have a visit.... and here some photo........ and they enjoy "cha dau" very much too...lol.... means a chinese traditional cultural of driking tea.....

              my house christmas tree paise haven't kept.....

                                       S.H.E my bro collection.......

                             Haha trying to exercise in my house.......

                                  yer... who like dy?????

                                    o no gamble.......(mr. wu house)

  hz... u see kei hand..... fish leong album can guess what they want to do....

      nah i'm not ???? is becoz they ask me post like this dy.... hz....

                                            hohoho.... see them..... lol

7 feb when "monsters" and "son" company me....(1st out without her)

well fell down down so out with "monsters" and "son" haha go midvalley watch movie.... quite late gah we move around 4pm and arrive there about 5.30pm coz need wait bus all that...... all so damn hungry coz haven't eat but decided to buy ticket 1st coz we take bus scare if late zho cannot back cyber so we go buy ticket and we boughted underworld 3.... well the movie ok geh... but just a bit bit boring la and thought the two couple can live together but... hz.....  so we bought ticket time 7.10pm start so we eat at macdonald 1st to settle our stomach..... and after end we went back home.... back around 11pm....... here some pic we took....

                                               with kei

          wit hui and two more leh....hehe.... sedang beratur beli ticket...

well need change u guys name dy and cannot call monsters anymore...haha..... so now need call super buddy...wahahha...lol....... and kai ye ah.. em...... lousy lo....

nescafe kickstart.....

Well the night friday i know that she is sad and i felt sad too.... i really thought can let go of her but..... well i try too.... but i msg her and she reply and told y and scold me that i can be like normal back and she don;t like.... i can chat and chat until left out her...  and be the central of attraction... and she said she hate this... and she felt angry and sad.... i dunno y i felt i still care for her... i sense her but i try to put her into the conversation but she just said ok..... i ask her 4 times r u ok..... and she never reply... and angryly she said back to cyber... then ok... that time we are friends ok coz althought yesterday broke up but i dy said we can be friends back so i bravely takes my guts and pretend that i'm nothing.... and when back i msg again are u ok...?? and she said hate me like this and i know u can let u go but i can't...?? wat??/ she like sending back msg and said what i did is not her interntion but i force her that night and she said soo.... i dunno what is the motive but most of u guys can think...... so at last all msg are private.... sorry.... that night i can't sleep and dream that i get to the final for nescafe kickstart.. i woke manytimes and felt un happy and untill 6am i wake and online and look at the result and it really stated congratulation and you been selected among 20finalist and to claim the Rm1000 please summit a video pitch to compete Rm10000.... but i nv happy.... maybe last time i will be happy but today hz... dunno y felling unhappy at all when know the result and i duno want share it with who..... so i just msg her and said i win all that but dun have mood.... well guys i join this competition becoz of her leh coz she like to shop and i thought having extra money is essential to me so that can let her shop.... i still blur whether to join or not untill when i really lighten up by my friends.... they were good to me.... and sorry guys that i lefted u guys out when i'm with her.... they told me to do the best and win the rm10000 and if win i promise to sponsor half of the money to buy a projector for the MMU club and told out rm2000 to treat them to play and the rest will gv to my parents and i will kept my self rm1000 for my own purpose..... ya i really wan to do the best now as this money doesn;t only make an extra income for me but also prove me that i have a great idea and even thought this proposal is not perfect but i just use little effort can get in and if i fully use maybe i can win much bigger chances... so i wan to win and share the hapiness to the friends around me .... if little money can make them happy i will share with them because when i am down they who company and advise me althoughtsometimes some of them em.... those 4 is very lousy and shout and popek popek but they were caring and supportive friends and it is good to have them as friends and i was happy too.... thanks guys who supported me and advise me.... and grow with me... love u guys more..... muacks....

at last solution

well i confronted her last thursday, because i feeling that she still have a barrier and avoiding me... I msg her and called her she nv reply and just untill she can't bare it she msg me that she in class waht do i want??? so i ask her since she said we as usual as bf and gf so i ask that can we have a dinner together and she like giving excuse untill i can't bare anymore i straight went up to her house and it seems like even the god asking me to do so because when i in lift i saw her housemate so it would be better off i straight go in and confront her.... when i go in she like nothing and just watch her movie and i just looked at her and she don't bother and straight go in kitchen take food.... and i ask her what she want and i'm stressfull and all she told me that she need time.... time time and time??? she dy said ok ok as usual me and him couple and the third party only friends ok....  but what she told me yesterday is like all lies... and why did she do so??? i dy tell me to break on wednesday and she said between us are friends and i said second confirmation becoz that time i really really open up my heart to let go... but why..why...and why she sent back msg to me ok as what we discuss this morning k?? we be couple and friend with him..... Why did she do so?? Is it i easy to be fool or is it i am the back up for her so when is time she broke with the boy i will always be there for her?? I was so angry and i on that time i never scare she force me to break up or what becoz that time i really really need a answer if not i will die from depression....... she asked me to in her room to discuss and i ask all the things in my heart... y u go out with him?? when it start? is he good all these..... all i ask for clarification to make sure there won't be any confusion later... and that mistake could be minimum to the lowest...." the discussion between her and me is private so sorry guys can't talk bout it... under malaysia law of privacy(cyberlaw)" lastly she said she love me no more and she love him and maybe she regret later that the guy maybe will not be as good as me or even concern as me but she said she dare to take the step. So i clarify to her 3 or 4 times to make sure that i did't force her to do so or what and repeat to her ok from my understanding that you love me no more and you want to be with him and in no other way or chances we could get back together and she agree,.... so on that moment i remind myself to be calm and like nothing happen go out of her room and just like proudly and normally declare to her house mate that me and her dy break up and i act like nothing and just hang around few minutes b4 i leave... i just hang around there eat her housemate bf cake and chat with them then make my way down to my house.... i just act cool and nothing with my friends below my house becoz there are around 12 of them there.. and a meeting is going on and i just go and sit there and have the meeting too.... i voice many ideas out and just like nothing and try to hide my feelings as pro as posibble..... after the meeting around 1 hour later.... i frankly tell them that i break up with kelly cheng and they like not get suprise or anything at all and just ask me are you ok in a smile..... i dun understand y there just said so??? and they just caring for me and always sing "feng shou kuai le" in a joking manner and said to me that they know i'm good and caring and she still break up with u then is not your fault but instead i should be happy and all the girls out there should be happy coz one more good guy to be grab.... frankly i should be happy but did i???? i dunno y but i should be happy for now as my financial burden is lighther and my time will be more to locate for friends as she dislike me going out and left her alone.... and all this half years she dislike i dun do or try do lesser if can't avoid, i even separate from my friends life and do wat ever she wants..... but she will like nv satisfy... i even dun care my face for her and wat he want i give except sometimes that i do not allow shirt that is too low and expose.....  is that not good enough for her.... i plan everything for her and think she is the right one and told my family but only cny that period all change and my dream cramble...... i always try tell myself don't worry be happy, be more happy that there are friends still around to support u and there are more time available for u to do things and know friends.... well seems all dy end and i should try my best to live without her presents in my life..... we can be friends and i hope we can too bit just friends to share with and friends too help out as i know her range of friends is little but the people who understand her and tolerate her is much more thinner....... so here we go mr mr mr hello, be ready and tackle the girls out there and i promise the other girl that i felt in love too and she is a nice girl i promise that i will treat her much more better then what i did previously.....  i wan to live with the person i can share the joy and hapiness in my life and i wish she will be happy with me too and i will give her the very best that i can provided and if i could let her shop when i have the ability too...... dear me please wake up and look for better...... 

the turning point whether trust or??

well tuesday 3/2/09 is the saddess day in my life??? But i still pretended in front of all my friends nothing and as usual and help them do the design for name card, system admin, create a solution for them untill i almost finish it up i can't bare anymore and i went in to room and tears start flowing like water... i wanna shout but i can't since there are about 8 people in my house and i don't want them to know.... You know y i'm so sad??? y becoz i been told something happen in my relationship... she said that we had a problem... and i dunno wat have i did wrong.... i ask and ask and she been avoiding me since monday...... as i'm a senstive person i sense that she have a third party in life.... and i force and force and finally he told me situation is that me and her have a barrier within and she wan time to think becoz of something very confusing... she said she confuse in our relationship and i felt weird... i straight walk out of the house seems i have a depression since she avoid me..... and my heart getting heavyier and heavyier... i cry, smash the lift as i dunno wat happen between us as we are still ok before the sem break and still msg during cny..... i out take a cab and straight buy dozen and dozen of beer.... i drank and drank and drank..... and i finally forget the problem in the moment.... one minute i fiished up 2 large bottle of beer.... well tell u frankly is hard to swallow and u drink in a rush way is easy for u to get choked and u will felt wanted vomit due to the gases.... then i finally drunk and the girl trying to find me when when my god sis been waiting for me for quite long in my condo and msged her where am i as my god sis can't reach me..... The girl call me few times and i was so drunk i even don't regconise her voice and she ask me where am i.... i really can't differential where is the place as i ak the cab to put me in the mid way and i drank and walk and walk untill i drop... i also dunno y i felt that sad...?? i been asking myself what did i do wrong what did i do wrong... but i think and think and i really can't think of anything......... i shouted smash the beer bottle as i was so sad and i don't know y that i had been not talking vulgar words for a long time as i forbidden myself to do so but due to the flow in my heart i shouted all out and i dunno why i can combine all the vulgar words and just shouted out in one breath..... it was a bit relax for a while and the feeling start come back.... well i been with this girl de half a year and frankly i love her more each day and i even told all my family members and all my friends that she will be the one for me and i tell myself she the one..... but it crushed just like that..... crushed, crushed.... i ask god what did i do in life to get such a hard punishment???? i'm an easy going person and i hardly get offended and get angry and even u ask me to help u do something and if within my range i will help no matter i have the time or not as i like to help people and make them happy... i ask HIM it is i help people deserve this kind of punishment???/ I never lie or go behind people back and i can swear to god i do things righteously and ecthically. This relationship is my 1st official relation because i'm the guy that won't start a relationship with a girl that easily and if i do so thats mean i'm serious on it... due to this i missed few chances althought some of it the girl even voice it out...we had gone to movie, go out and even msg day and nite but i said NO! NO! NO! why because i know that i can't give her what they want on that time and i really haven't ready for it.... So is this make HIM punished me like that?? I just want to make sure that when the girl with me i wanted to make sure that she will be happy and i don't want to have uncertain relationship.... i want commitment in it.... even i think back the few relationship that doesn't started i was happy to make the decision because i did't want them to fall into the hole and then get hurted.... well for them we are still friends and even we go out sometimes as friends..... BUT is to much for me now.... the current situation i'm having.... i been fallen into the hole much deeper then i thought..... my heart scatter and it hurt reallly that much that i been having a big stone on my chest and i can't breath... that night ii drunk and when i'm a bit concious i ask her, what had happen between us, and finally push and push he told me he love another guy... i said who and she don't want to tell and finally i guess the right one just as i predicted this one will happen 3months ago.... i already tell her that don't go out with this guy and she tell me can't i know more friends??? but the problem u know the guy through internet and if a guy suddenly always msg u and always in the midnight 3am to 4am is that call friend??? sometimes the word is so flirty and when i see i piss off.... i dy said that guy have some feeling on her but what she told me you are too jealous when ever i want to go out with a guy... man i'm a senstitive person and i can know what i see and sense... i'm the person that can judge a person by its look and and the way they speak even throught msg and the photo, i know is hard to believe but is truth.... 1st time if i saw the guy and i judge is not the right type to be friends i will not pursue myself for it even if rich or he personnaly socialise with me.... many of my friends felt weird why sometimes i like this like i don't like a person and feeling not happy.. well i just shut my mouth and time proven i was right is not worth to take them....... people said never judge a book by its cover but my feeling and alertness have proven me i'm right from the start since in form 2 i been like this.... i can felt the person limitness of a joke can be taken or sometimes overtalk but hence some can be over it and doens't know they get over the border.... i'm not here to praise myself but is the truth.... from the beginning i tell her that i'm this kind of person and she will tell me stop nonsence. don't be so anaylitical or over sesitive but how many did i proven is right??? The guy she know it through the net and she was so brave to go out with him the 1st time and know just in a short time.... Few months ago i already ask her to intro to me the boy and said i'm his bf but hence it nv happen.... i know they have been sms each other but it stoped for a while but last sem i dy sense back they got msg each other but hence i just shut my mouth.... as she easy to get piss off.... and i really don't wan to argue.... See and know really with that guy he had the feeling on.... he even told me that the guy felt the same and even told her??? i was so mad and ask for more... and she frankly tell everything that she even go to the guy house b4.,.... omg after hearing this i was so angry and piss off i want to find the guy out and settle it once and for all..... she still my gf and he bring him to his house and hence she follow.... bull shit.... and what make me more and more and more and more angry is... they go behind my back which is the most offended thing in my life... u told me and i know is ok but if you go behind my back i can tell you i will remember this for the rest of my life and as long as i am alive i will revenge on this... yes revenge coz i dy said i'm easy going person anything i can accept but behind my back is a definitely no..... no reason to talk to this.... i frankly tell i will do it miserably and make those ppl go behind my back regret as i believe in my ability to do things is a definitely done percentage.... when i get into it and if i don't have the ability to do now i will do it later.... same as my uncle... i can help him get his business and he been earning profit from my idea but if he bully his sister(my mom) i can assure he get what he deserve.... i had a principle in life that is as long as i could accept the fact and u did't do anything unectical behind my back i won't revenge as i had to do so.... revenge is a bad thing but when it get up my head you will get it from me the worst nightmare in your life.... frankly those know me can't think i can be this kind of person becoz i nv mad b4 and i mean it althought something really bad happen i can still smile and ntg becoz i learn to think b4 i act.... only few in the range of my friend see me mad b4 and when i mad the whole world around me know but i will jst angry and did't do any action but for those thing that 100% i will revenge is behind my back, treaten my family or bully my family and last use me just for his own good my feeling like that i will swear to god as long as i live in this world i will make YOU miserable in life... Yes i'm the worst nightmare people could never think i could do this kind of bad things.... but is fair enough for me as long as u hurt me nevermind but if u do those three things i will use all my power and resource i have to take you down to the ground even if he's a dato or minister.... i swear to god don't wrong estimate my ability as for now i nv use up all my brain juices as i the lazy person that won't make the planning 1st but i will do it on the spot i have and the effort i put in... frankly untill now in my life i nv pour 100% of my brain effort into something and i jsut think i write and nv change thats y when my friend ask me to repeat the idea it will be better and longer thats y untill now my course mate will ask me speak slowly becoz the 2nd time i said will be different and same as my revenge i will pour 100% on it..... don't challenge me!!!
Yes she go behind my abck and yes i would like to revenge and she told me that they stay in separate room and house and i try to calm down and i decided to trust her as i really love her.... but the problem is she lie to me.... omg... as that sunday she suppose to company me thats y i so early abck but she told me tonight no places in my car so all girls and u no need go... i was so sad man... dissapointed the 2nd time she dished me like that.. 1st is to a concert 2nd is this..... i msg her and i was angry and i walk out... and u know what when she finsih her movie she nv msg me and i msg her where is she and she wrote i wan sleep de tired.... and i said where is the company u promise and just reply sorry sorry sorry..but hence she at the guys house.... i felt so cheated... i know that just by wednesday..... and the next morning i msg her in the morning and ask her for breakfast or lunch i sent almost 10 msg and called and she reply a short msg sorry not free... omg then i msg and msg and nv reply untill wednesday she still in the guy house coz she told me she stay there and back in the afternoon... o man behind my back and hence lie on the spot this is the cruel things to me but i choose to calm down and she msg me the whole day and told me the whole story... i ask her that the boy smoke, beer, clubbing and gamble why she still like him since she hate all this and even he go to cybercafe and when i just open up my computer and play games jst awhile she get piss off but him..... she reply coz he leave far and jst see one day or two day in a week u is always.. and i pissed off and ask then he go behind ur back becoz this u also ok and she just reply dunno... dunno..... o man for the god sake there is two different personality in her... i'm the good one hence she order me around angry me with this and that but those thing that she angry are doing by him...him.... i ask and ask untill i a time where i said ok... i don't mind you have a friend nor you go to his house to sleep but u must promise me that as long as is not behind my abck and tell frankly wat have you guys done and don't do the unectically and the 10 commandments in christ i swear to god i won't jealous nor said anything and update herself and reply my msg.... and she said ok... untill the time i ask for comfirmation are we still together.. she nv reply and i call her many times and did''t answer and lastly i sent few more msg nad i dy guess what she reply i'm in class can't u stop bothering.... omg my sensitiveness start to come back.... is like i have a barrier dy and i thought been settle but no is like she just entertain me and thats all.... and i ask and she said yes yes yes and i msg the same question are we still together and she said other things.... using red hearing man.... is not answering the question.... untill she get angry i dunno as she nv want to face me face to face and just msg and ask me don't force her or else she wan to choose to let go o me... and i ask her is that the answer u wan and hence she said because i'm forcing her???? then i ask her wat u want and she said give her sometime omg how long she want to wait???? i said i give you two days or untill monday you give me the answer and she said why you must force me can't we be usual... and i ask wat is usual she said friend good friend.... and i said then u wan break up and choose him she nv answer and said y must u force me....and i said how long you wan me to wait and she reply i dunno need to wait and i said give me and answer... and she told me that she need time to see to give me and answer i said what u mean and she said she need to see the guy wat he is and u will be piss of by this and i won't blame u if u dunwan to wait....?? i said wat u mean is it until he propose then u only answer me??/ and she just answer i need time to see.... what??? is it i'm a backup if the guy really play her then she back to my side??? is it i'm her backup plan and i'm just a "pelampung" for her.. and i said so u choose him la is it... and if he dun propose then i'm ur pelampung and she just said dunno... then i said ok u just said are we together or what and she reply okokokokok lo since i want to ask she said ok fine friendslo satisfy mei... on that moment i dy calm down my heart and decided to ask ones more as comfirmation and i almost accept the decision and ask and said ok is it your final answer that you just wan to be friend??? and she said i think ur heart dy die. Since u will ask so... and i reply i love u more than words can said and my heart will die only u do the comfirmation as i need to respond to my family and friends since i dy told them u the one to them... and i dy let go dy and decided to go out and she suddenly reply K. As wt i said tis morning till now. i will con'tinue everything as usual bt jz add him as my fren n i jz normal . k? and i don't really understand and confuse what she trying to said and ask u mean me and you as friend? and she reply NO AH. As you wan.K? and after a while when i'm on the way out i msg her bye la... i go out with god sis...and she reply suddenly and said Is my answer sufficient to satisfy u. U a bye answer.... and i said i wan go out and we can be usual b4 cny n u still wan to go to his house??? and she reply yes. As what i told u. and i quite late reply and she sent a msg again and ask me what u want? is it be wif u, i got no contact wif others n can't go anyone else house to overnight or play? and all i could tell her is then as u promise the 10 commandment k... only god knw n u knw... bt i cn tell u if i heard n sense.. i will nt tolerate as we said frankly...n trust...upromised won't go behind my back this morning n tats all i need u to do... n reply my msg like wat u said...but frankly if ask 100 girls 99.9 also won't agree u go.. bt since u wan then u go.... others his history and i don;t wish to write de...... others might think i'm a stupid person because i still trust the girl and i still can bare the girl go to his house but since u love someone u will love unconditionally i know i might be stupid but love is like that love is blind and i'm blind in front of her... i dunno whether she is using me or what but i want to believe her and trust in her 1st but when if i really found something bad happen behind me and she is just playing with my feeling and use me as a backup. O Lord grant me wisdom and let me have the faith in YOU to help me get over it and for the god sake O Lord if she broke the 10 commandments that she had promised me to follow YOUR ORDER not to commit the commandments i hope that LORD will be mercyfull to spare her and let me deal with her and let me know the truth as O LORD YOU are the one i am seeking for the wisdom and courage and guildance and let me face her face to face by myself and the faith that i have in YOU LORD..... AMEN.... guys pray for me that she won't go behind my back and may her forget about him becoz she had told me she trying to get less time with him and let her faith in this relation grow back.....